Secular Seder

We live in a world radicalized and polarized by religion. The terrorist bombings in Moscow early this morning represent merely one manifestation of the power religion has to guide-and misguide-global citizens who identify most strongly with an ambiguously written text of their god(s). The past thousands of years have witnessed wars fought in the name of religious persecution, religious freedom, religious imposition, religious conversion, and religious rejection. I realize that religion is a personal and complicated issue for every individual, but I often wonder how much international inter- and intra-religious strife is caused by attempts to conform to a few people's often strict interpretations of a certain religion, without leaving much room for error- or worse, leaving so much room that all actions become dignified or redeemable.


As a Jewish woman of Russian descent, I can safely say that my ancestors have been involved in the vast majority of these religious wars, most often as the group being banished, forcibly converted, pogrom-ed, or simply killed. I am the first to defend Judaism in the face of Antisemitism and I proudly celebrate many aspects of Jewish culture, from the music to the food. However, I, like so many Jews around the world, live by my own moral compass rather than that of the Torah (or any other realm of Jewish law). I grew up going to a school in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood. I have been to Israel and was even Bat Mitzvahed in Jerusalem (reading phonetic Hebrew, mind you). I lived in Prague, a fairly hostile city to religion and Judaism in particular (Neo-Nazism is making a frightening comeback all throughout Europe and U.S. KKK leader David Duke is a household name for many Central Europeans). All of these experiences have strengthened my connection to the rich, beautiful, and tragic history of Judaism while further distancing me from any form of religiosity.


This all brings me to tonight, the first night of Passover, and my first ever "Secular Seder". Tonight, I decided that the most important part of my favorite Jewish holiday was not really about religion at all, but about gathering and remembrance. My Seder consisted of Trader Joes tamale appetizers, homemade matzoh ball soup and charoset, Hot Toddies for dessert, and the company of wonderful people. I celebrated my Pesach very casually with one of my dearest and oldest friends Alexa, her boyfriend Logan, and our friend Kirsten (the latter two are not Jewish, but wanted to share the culinary and emotional experience). We had many laughs, told the story of Passover (somewhat butchering the story and using many ellipses), found no afikomen, sang no songs, asked none of the four questions, and recited no prayers.


It was a bit unconventional, possibly sacrilegious to some, and exactly how I wanted my night to progress. Will it be my new Passover tradition? Probably not. I still love the more traditional Seders I attended with my family growing up. However, this is just another way I have been able to do "being Jewish" with my own rules and my own priorities.